Month: May 2014

Lovely Concepts of Love in East

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This is exactly what my brain says to my heart but it adds that if you love ‘her’ again, I’ll kill you. This is how we perceive love in east. Relationships are not as easily made and are not as disposable as in the west. You fall for someone, you get married and you are supposed to live with that person for the rest of your life. The concept of family and combined family system is still seen here in east. People contradict with each other and tend to be harsh on each other only as a manifestation of their love for each other.

More or less same is the case with the relationships involving two persons. When they fall for each other, they just cannot help it. They fall for each other, every day for the rest of their lives. I always wondered what love exactly is. Is it something spiritual, is it something psychological or is it something physical? Why and how can a person devote his/her life unconditionally for just one single person? Every human being is more or less like a piece of a gadget that you might want to get rid of after excessively experiencing it. Like gadgets, humans have their own limitations, humans have their own undesirable traits, humans have their own unwanted behaviors and humans have their very own attitudes.

I figured it out when instead of a gadget, I fell in love with a person. That day I figured out that love is not spiritual neither psychological nor physical. That day I realized love is personal and medicinal and it’s an addiction, an amazing and quite shocking discovery. You get pleasure just for feeling the presence of someone around you and you get pleasure for just listening to the voice of that person. I never found such an effective anxiety treatment than to just listen to what she has to say to me. I know the words already but when they come from her, they feel fresh, they feel new, they bear this charm and they have this deep penetration down to my soul.

But in the east, where love feels this way, unfortunately social factors are stronger and more important than those two persons involved. It’s just not those two people get to decide about their lives rather these are the social customs that take major and important decisions. Long story short, at times, there are breakups not because of the clash of the persons involved but because of the clash of social customs. They say time heals what medicines can’t but someday when you fell the presence of the same person around you, when you surprisingly find that person in front of you, when you have that aroma of love once again, when you fall for the same person once again, it’s unwanted, it’s magical and it’s painful. You can feel the aroma for a while but can never hold it into your hands. Tonight when that pleasant pain rushed back to me that is when my brain, in concussion, said to my heart,’’ if you love her again, I will kill you.’’ And my heart said, smiling, to my brain,’’ I just skipped a beat when she looked at me.’’



Watch your tho…

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Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habits. Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny.

They say you are what your thoughts are. How a man can be something else than what he thinks for his 24 hours. Today the neuroscience has proved that the associating patterns of neurons in human brain change as one thinks on different perspectives. The thoughts of a person affect him not only spiritually but also physically. These thoughts make us what we are and these are these thoughts than indeed decide one’s destiny.

Why I Loved Her !!

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I Loved Her

Would you rather drown or be burnt alive?

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FRIENDS, no doubt, is the forever hit of all the times of all the sitcoms. Like most others, I was also a huge fan and was a regular viewer of the show. The characters were easy for everyone to relate them to his or her life and the show not only provided entertainment to the people but also taught a lot about very small yet very important aspects of life.

I always get a little judgmental about Ross Geller when it comes to his conversations with Rachel when he’s trying to ‘make a move’ towards Rachel. Those little embarrassing moments of conversations, incompletely delivered expressions, lack of right words at the right time and basically the freaking out of Ross in front of Rachel.

I always ask myself why he doesn’t spill out what he wants to say. Why he doesn’t make his point clear. Why he keeps on proving himself a stupid person. Being a PHD of Paleontology, Dr. Ross Geller doesn’t seem to be smart at all when it comes to relationships. And the situation gets extremely hilarious when he brings Chandler to talk to a couple of unknown ladies in the Central Perk café when he finds out that Rachel is seeing some guy from her office.

He sees them holding a newspaper, reads a news about flood and asks those women the very memorable question. ‘’Would you rather drown or be burnt alive?’’ is what comes out of his mouth. I laughed out not only on the situation but also on the fact that how come a person who hopes to get a girl impressed can come up with this as a starter for the conversation.

Well they say you don’t know it unless you experience it. A friend of mine has a huge crush on a girl, literally obsessed with her. The guy’s pretty smart when it comes to regular stuff and pretty much Ross Geller when it comes to making conversations with that girl. He goes to her, talks stupid and keeps on complaining that she didn’t respond well. He gets fainted when he goes to her and always does something stupid, realizes that he just made a blunder and then leaves the place under pressure without even saying goodbye to the girl.

When I debate the side of the girl, she might think of him as almost an insane person, who comes to her to talk to her, talks stupid and runs away. When I listen to my friends, he feels too much pressure when he goes to her. And when I see him going to that girl, I see Ross Geller going to that girl over and over again to ask her ‘Would you rather drown or be burnt alive?’

Controversial Scandals

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A couple of months ago, the scandal of Pakistani actress Meera struck the news. In a ‘religious’ state this is not at all acceptable and members of various sects and divisions of the society have passed their ‘negative reviews’ and ‘concerns’ over the controversial video. And for the purpose stated, one has to watch it as well which has not yet been confessed by any member of the respected religious and civil community.

All through my life, I have had the expression that Pakistan was achieved for the implementation of Islamic rules and regulations. At one end of the spectrum, there exists a class that doesn’t allow women to get their faces out of veils. On the other end of the spectrum, there exists a class that doesn’t believe in these outdated customs of the society. In between these two extremes, there has always been a middle class partially supporting both the sides and partially trying to escape through both these, the victims of the both and the confused ones. And this is a global concern, wherever some religious people exist in any part of the world, the same metaphor proves to be true.


The matter of fact is, websites are full of the controversial videos, although banned in Pakistan but easily breached nationwide by Muslims of Islamic Democratic Pakistan. Clips found over there represent the moral character of the nation. The idea of recycling has revolutionized the scientific community and the civilian community has adapted it as well in its own style. Disposable love-relations have made their ways in society termed under the headings of freedom, enjoyment, liberation and love.

Having married someone you love is surely a destination but having someone using your love is relatively an innovative concept. Next is the desire of repeated lovely satisfactions and the recording of those moments as manifestations of the great moments spent together and the cycle goes on. If denied, then one or two clips are uploaded to record the ‘protest against cheating over’. Lives of many persons have been affected by this mere misuse of mobile phone technology as will be the personal life and dying career of the Pakistani actress Meera. Though she doesn’t know how to speak English correctly, though she doesn’t have the common sense of Einstein but that doesn’t rule her out as a human being or at least a lady to be respected.

Islam has stressed enough on the character building of individuals and the society as a whole. We pray, we perform Hajj, we preach religion to others, and we tend to make others embrace Islam. How come we don’t do this to ourselves? Society is nothing but all the individuals in it. In an Islamic state, such incidents freak me out as a researcher of my own religion, culture, traditions and morals.

The emphasis in such a society shouldn’t be on becoming an Islamic society, if the society becomes a ‘human society’ it would mean a lot to everyone living inside this society. And this might reduce the recycling and replacing of trust, love, relations and human beings.



And unfortunately, the phenomena isn’t just about Pakistan only, this is a worldwide phenomenon. When it comes to these issues every state is a stake holder including West, States, Emirates, Africa and the list goes on. This is the issue that belongs to the society of this well-developed, 21st century’s well evolved and progressed earth. And I confess of having breached and visited these sites to have an overview of the players involved in the game.

When i visited a Hospital

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A couple of days ago, I had an appointment for eyes examination. I had been experiencing floaters since the last couple of months. Although this is perfectly normal to experience these but since eyes are precious, I thought to consult the doctor about that. I reached the hospital a little earlier and sat in the waiting room. When you sit in such place, when you see the misery of people, when you see people lying unconscious being taken to different places in the hospital, when you see the pain in the faces of patient’s family members, it’s then you realize how lucky you are for sitting there with nothing major to worry about.

As I sat there, a person was waiting with his father, sitting in the wheel chair, for the staff to take him to the x-ray room. Though his father, who was about in his late 70’s or early 80’s, had lived a life but the guy looked extremely worried about him, holding his hand again and again hoping to suck this pain out of his body. All those years of his life now would have been like yesterday’s dream with the present slipping out of the hand like tiny grains of sand.

In this situation, I realized that I had been constantly ignoring a medium loud but very sharp sound coming continuously into my ears and unconsciously it’s bothering me continuously. I looked at the LCD but it was mute, where the sound was coming from then. Sitting in the same hall, I found a person with a beard holding his cell phone in his hand laughing and gossiping with the person sitting by and continuously playing ‘Naats’ ( the verses you use to praise the Holy Prophet) and reciting a Naat is of course thought to be a good deed as far as religion is concerned. Alhamdulillah I, being a Muslim, listen to Naats and but when I looked around, a hall full of patients, waiting for their turn for the examination to their respective doctor, someone might be diabetic, someone might have hepatitis, someone might have surgical examination, someone might have been suffering from a stroke and when I looked at the worried faces of  family members of those patients and I just knew that what this guy is doing is not a religious good deed rather he’s disturbing the hospital, which should be listed under bad deeds, a sin actually irrespective of the fact that whether he knew it or not.

For a while, I thought to get up and tell him to use a little common sense and turn his cell phone off but as a citizen of Islamic Democratic Pakistan, where when a person wants to murder someone, he says that he insulted the religion and he should be killed, I certainly didn’t want to be a martyred. Bottom line is, I could not stand up and go to that guy. Why, because I’m scared of these people and I’m sick of this sick mentality. Others might have been disturbed as well but like me, no one dared to stand up to say anything. If he wanted to worship, if he wanted to listen to naats, he could have used a head phone.

Reciting Quran and listening to Naats is a good deed, no Muslim can deny it neither am I trying to deny it but Muslims don’t do it for their 24 hours. The Muslim doctors don’t recite verses when they examine a patient, they listen to the patient, concentrate on the treatment of the disease and they don’t turn on their vcd’s or cell phones recording of Naats. This is what I know despite the fact that I am not a genius but you do not need the brain of Einstein to understand that a hospital is not the place for making such noises. People are suffering, if you can’t help them, you don’t increase to their worries. But being a citizen of Islamic Democratic Pakistan, I could not inform that guy of this very little piece of information because I’m scared and I absolutely do not have any idea what version of Islam is being followed here.

And someone’s saying felt very true that:

We can give life for religion, we can take life for religion but we cannot act upon religion.

Tale of an Old Man

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Once upon a time there was a wise man lying on his death bed. People gathered around him to for their wishes for the upcoming unknown, unseen scary journey through the doors of death. People wanted to hear what were the thoughts of the old man, what could be his confessions. The old man told them the story of his life. When I was a young man, the old man spoke, I wanted to change the entire world. I started struggling towards my goal but I realized that the entire world is too big for a single man to change so I put my efforts to changing the condition of my nation. Soon it became clear that a nation is not for a single man to inspire. I turned my focus onto changing the members of my family for their own good but once again, I could not bring any positive change into the members of my family. As an old man now when I think about the journey, I realize that I chose the path upside down. I should have started to change my own self to inspire the ones around me and the change into those persons would have inspired my nation and my nation would have inspired the entire world.

Having read that story, I wondered for a moment. The path to change should be inside-out path not the outside-in, as the old man suggested. I read somewhere that a wise man tries to learn the lessons from others experiences and the fool tries everything for himself and draws the same conclusion afterwards. A lot of people are aware of this ‘holy grail’ and they do practice it as well, when they’re kids. When I joined my first job as an engineer, I was told that the stuff in reality doesn’t work as suggested by books. I laughed inside my head saying it’s for the sake of theory in books that these machines have been designed and being operated by fools who think that these are something else other than the theories described in books.

After a couple of months I realized that the man was right. The craft to survive in reality is not the practice of theoretical principles rather the craft involves the manipulation. It’s not the manipulation of machines rather it’s the manipulation of how well can you make a fool out of someone else. Certainly it has never been taught to me in my entire educational career and this is when I was convinced that the stuff in reality doesn’t work in accordance to the ‘fair and square’ descriptions written in theoretical volumes. Unfortunately the same principle applies to every person, every nation, every country and the entire world. Principles of humanity are always taught to be used as a crust to sweeten the bitter mode of how things actually work outside the books.

A person might find himself wise enough to follow the old man, to bring about a constructive change into his personality. When that person holds some rank into any social or industrial institution, he’d be told that things don’t actually work like the old man said. Today the tale has been changed. The old man just did the right thing, he didn’t change himself, he moved on with the flow. People in those old times didn’t have the brilliance required to understand what old man did and in the end, eventually, the old man had to come up a theory to cover up why he missed his aims and taught the wrong lesson. If a person corrects himself, he’d be an unfit part of the machinery of this society and the society ‘unwillingly’ will have to pull him out and throw him into garbage. Today the tale goes like this: Although you cannot fool everyone all the times but you have to keep trying to fool them all, all the times.